Was Trump abducted by aliens?

Was Trump abducted by aliens?

The question of whether Trump was abducted by aliens may seem strange, but it would fall in line with the other stupid questions congressional democrats are asking.

This would be Paul Trifthauser as a congressman.

Trifthauser: “Mr. Cohen, I have several questions that I believe must be entered into the record that my colleagues have skipped over due to time constraints.

“To the best of your knowledge, has President Trump ever been abducted by aliens?”

Cohen: “I don’t know that, though he did appear several times on the Howard Stern show.”

Trifthauser: “As far as you know, does the President own a Ouija board?”

Cohen: “As far as I know, no.”

Trifthauser: “You are aware that former First Lady Hillary Clinton had a seance and brought Elanor Roosevelt back from the dead.”

Cohen” I am aware of that, and yes, Hillary’s Ouija board is in the White House. You asked if President Trump had one.”

Trifthauser: “The next questions are to clear up rumors that are circulating around Washington.”

Cohen: “Shoot.”

Trifthauser: “Has the President ever eaten grapes out of a pair of Rosie O’Donnell’s panties?”

Cohen: “As far as I know, no.”

Trifthauser: “Is he Theodore Roosevelt’s love child?”

Cohen: “As far as I know, no.”

Trifthauser: “While watching an episode of the Andy Griffith show where Barney was afraid to ask Thelma Lou for a date to the Mount Pilot spring dance, did the President scream, “Come on Barney, grow a pair,” at the TV?

Cohen: “As far as I know, no.”

Trifthauser: “So, what you’re saying is the President did not call Barney Fife a coward?”

Cohen: “As far as I know, no, though he did say he’d do Thelma Lou.”  

Trifthauser: “Is there anybody else President Trump say he’d do?”

Cohen: “Yes, there was a long list. June Cleaver, the Little Mermaid, Belle, the Flying Nun, Lara Croft, the Tomb Raider, Olivia Newton-John, the entire Team USA Olympic women’s soccer team and Betty Rubble to name a few.”

Trifthauser: “As far as you know, has he had sex with any of these women?”

Cohen” “Only Betty Rubble.”   

Trifthauser: “As far as you know, Mr. Cohen, has anyone ever performed oral sex on the President in the oval office.”

Cohen: “Besides Sean Hannity?”

Trifthauser: “Well, aside from what is already common knowledge.”

Cohen: “As far as I know, no.”

Trifthauser: “As far as you know, does the President send out Twitter messages in his underwear.”

Cohen: “As far as I know, no.”

Trifthauser: “One last question, Mr. Cohen. As far as you know, has the President ever had prostitutes give him a golden shower?”

Cohen: “A golden shower?”

Trifthauser: “Yes, that would be where prostitutes urinate on him?”

Cohen: “Besides Hollywood and the staffs of CNN and MSNBC?”

As stupid as these questions may seem, they’re in line with what Congress is asking. Why do we elect people and pay them $170,000 a year to ask stupid questions?

 

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